“I don’t know if I will have the time to write anymore letters

because I might be too busy trying to participate.

So if this does end up being the last letter,

I just want you to know that I was in a bad place before I started high school

and you helped me.

Even if you didn’t know what I was talking about

or know someone who’s gone through it.

You made me not feel alone.

Because I know there are people who say all these things don’t happen.

And there are people who forget what it’s like to be sixteen when they turn seventeen.

And know these will all be stories someday

and our pictures will become old photographs

and we’ll all become somebody’s mom or dad.

But right now these moments are not stories.

This is happening.

I am here and I am looking at her

and she is so beautiful.

I can see it.

This one moment when you know you’re not a sad story,

you are alive.

And you stand up and see the lights on buildings

and everything that makes you wonder,

when you were listening to that song

on that drive with the people you love most in this world.

And in this moment, I swear, we are infinite.”

Now that the cliche is over I would like to explain.

It is quite hard to live and be alive sometimes. There are times where I can’t even get out of bed and I don’t want to see or talk to the people that I love so dearly. There are times when I feel like i have hit rock bottom but I am surrounded by my friends and there is no reason to feel this way. I often question what the point is of really being here and I often decide that there is none.

But this feeling? This feeling does not compare to the feeling of being surrounded by your best friends and singing a stupid song about a boat. This feeling does not compare to sitting in a car with them and blasting girl empowerment songs. This feeling is small and frail in comparison to that feeling of pure joy and happiness because you have lived another day and that extra day has been good. It is almost indescribable.

Dylan Scott started to play Piano Man by Billy Joel which is one of my all time favorite songs and I started to cry. I started to cry because I’m that moment I did not want to die. I started to cry because when that happened, I was living in the moment and basking in it. I was thriving. I put my hand on my heart and just let all that joy sink in because I never know when it will be bad again.

This is why my friends are one of my reasons for being here, because I could only ever truly live by experiencing these sorts of things with them. I treasure those moments because they are so few.

I understand that monologue from that movie. It’s like you are soaring. In that exact moment, everything seems to be in place and it seems like it has been just waiting for you to come along in order to experience it.

In that moment, I was infinite.